Friday, February 29, 2008

Grrr... I'm Restless!


I normally don't like to post so soon after having posted an interview because I don't want to take attention away from industry news and stuff... I'm restless and I'm angry. Some people know that I usually can't sleep at night (I'm a night owl... duhhh. How else do you explain my rampant partying and sexcapades?), and because I haven't been sleeping and there's nothing to do sometimes, I've been reorganizing all of mine and my brother's stuff in the master bedroom cause he's straight... and so he's naturally a messy, unorganized wierdo. Well, after going through the nightstands, the closet, the cabinets, etc., I've been finding shit from the past two years I thought I've lost. I've been finding designer watches, jewelry, colognes, lotions, skin care products, and other trinkets and baubles. He even stole a condom box designed by Alessi that I bought a year and a half ago when I was in college... and after living through Hurricane Katrina, the amount I paid for this shiny object cost me what was in those days a small fortune. Ummm... by the way, I'm easily seduced by shiny objects... teehee.


Where was I? Oh yeah... what the fuck, dude?! When I was in Germany and I needed money cause I was running low on funds while I wasn't getting paid since I didn't have a German visa, he only lent me $300... and with the conversion rate to Euros, that's nothing. But all of a sudden, there's like $7000 worth of missing shit that's been turning up all over the place, and half the shit is ruined. The watches don't work, the cologne bottles are empty but still in the cabinets, my condom box is scratched up and it didn't even seal tightly like it's supposed to. Does he know how many people I've had to sleep to get just half of these things? I am sooooo PISSED! The worst part about it is that I found three condoms in the condom box. An Ultra Thin Trojan (Yay for the next guy who'll be fucking me), and two Durex condoms with Chinese characters on it, which obviously mean they were purchased during one of his many trips to Shanghai where he works. Not only do I dislike Durex condoms cause they seem to suck for guys with huge dicks... and me loves some o' that huge dicks, but they were made in China. Do you know how many Chinese people are out there in China? Any my brother chooses willingly to trust Chinese condoms?! Seriously... I had to throw them away!

I've decided that for revenge, I'm stealing either the antennas off of his remote control cars that he's spent months building (by the way, he's 10 years older than me) or I'm stealing one of his Hermes ties and one of his Jim Thompson ties. I know the former would be a bitchier thing to do cause each one of those cars cost a couple hundred... but I don't think I can pass up the ties... They have a shiny sheen to the fabric. Damn! Why do I have to be so easily seduced by shiny objects?!

And just so you stay interested... here's a reduced picture of my ass I took Wednesday night/Thursday morning cause I couldn't sleep:

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Interview: Jesse Santana


Jesse Santana has been around in the industry for a few years and he’s made a big splash since he started back in 2005. Most recently, his appearance in Jet Set Studio’s On Fire! has gotten people to talk about him non-stop. But recently, his name has been the talk of the town for a different reason. Santana recently published a general letter titled “Pornstar/Escort: Where to Draw the Line” on his blog, discussing the problems of the blurred line between the titles of escort, model and porn star. Lately, he has been receiving overwhelming comments; many which were positive and supportive, but also there were quite a few comments that were overwhelmingly negative. This is where I came in. Santana wanted to do an interview to clarify his intentions and his message. I encourage all of you to at least listen to what he has to say.


Kyler Coy: 2008 is currently you’re third year in the Adult Entertainment Industry, correct? Would you categorize your participation in the industry as more of a positive or negative influence in your life?

Jesse Santana: Correct, I’m coming up on my third year in the industry. I would say it’s been a very positive influence, in that it’s made me a lot more comfortable and ambitious…I mean, once you’ve been naked on camera for the whole world to see, I don’t really think there’s much you can’t accomplish, or try to anyway…hah.

Kyler Coy: How did you actually break into the industry? What made you want to do it?

Jesse Santana: While I was living in Kentucky, I was in a Gay.com chat room and was approached by a Corbin Fisher scout, and asked to submit my photos and info to the site. Of course, I did, and then I appeared on the site shortly after.

Kyler Coy: Before you started, was there always an appeal about the industry that motivated your decisions to participate in films?

Jesse Santana: Of course there was! (Laughing) What’s more exciting than showing your hole to the whole world?! Just kidding, but really, I do like the idea of being able to reach out to so many people, even if it is through sex. (Winks)

Kyler Coy: I bet your fans like it more. (Winks back) But, I understand you’ve written a serious article on your blog about porn stars and how they’re not necessarily escorts or prostitutes. Most people in the industry have read it; I know I have. What inspired you to write the article? Why now?

Jesse Santana: Ever since I’ve entered the industry there has been a huge increase in the number of offers I receive to do escorting work, which is of course, to be expected. Of course I can’t exactly mention any names, but the thing that triggered my reaction was when I was doing an appearance in L.A. when I was approached by a very well known individual in the porn industry, and asked if I would like to meet some clients of his. I told this person that I wasn't necessarily offended, but that I also wasn't interested. The next day a trusted and respected mentor of mine emailed me, relaying the same exact message from the guy who approached me before. This bothered me...especially when this mentor of mine said that I should be flattered that people want to spend their hard earned money on me, and that no matter what I did, I would never be able to change people's outlooks and opinions of porn stars. I still told him that I could try.

Kyler Coy: I also understand you’ve received both criticism and praise for the blog. Can you tell me about a few of them and how they initially made you feel?

Jesse Santana: The criticism at first made me feel like I had come at this the wrong way, which is why I’m thankful to be doing this interview, in order to clear some things up. The praise that I received for writing the article at once told me I was doing the right thing for myself and anyone else who shares my point of view. It’s kind of like being the kid that finally raises his hand to ask a question that everyone else in the class has wanted to know the answer to.

Kyler Coy: Where has most of the criticism been coming from?

Jesse Santana: Most of it is coming from bloggers and fans who don’t want anything to conflict with their ideas of who and what porn stars are, as well as from the guys themselves who are both escorts and porn stars… who probably just think I’m being prejudice, I guess… haha.

Kyler Coy: It’s interesting that so many people in the industry would fight you on this. Are you afraid that this article may negatively impact your career in the future?


Jesse Santana: Not at all, I have too much faith in the true fans of the industry to worry about such things. And besides, between FabScout, Jet Set Studios, and Cocky Boys, I’m in good hands… the only person that could bring me down is me, and I won’t, not anytime soon. Hah.

Kyler Coy: I hear people all the time talk about how objectified they feel. But don’t you think it’s partly a trade-off of being in the industry?

Jesse Santana: You’re right. I don’t mind being objectified as a sex object. That truly is what I put myself up for when I take off my clothes for the world to see. What I have a problem with is being stereotyped.

Kyler Coy: But you and every other male model in the industry do run the risk of putting yourselves in a position where people see you perform sexually, and don’t get the chance to view you in any other setting. For example, one of my best friends is a major name in the industry, he does escort, but he is also a MST therapist. People see the former two, but the latter is part of his personal private life. He keeps his job and his real name from the public so he can maintain a comfortable level of privacy. Do you think the reason why it’s so difficult to not feel somewhat used when being a porn star is that one has to live two extremes that for most of us will never coincide?

Jesse Santana: Very true. Porn stars have commented on the article, some even saying that it’s stupid, because I knew what I was signing up for when I entered the industry. I whole-heartedly have to disagree. When John Doe signs up for the part of the phantom, in The Phantom of the Opera, he doesn’t automatically assume that the people who will watch the show will actually think that he goes home and runs around in a white mask.

Kyler Coy: I have to say that I do find a great amount of legitimacy in your blog. You reiterate quite an important point: men are just idiots. Nah, I’m just kidding. But a lot of people don’t ever look past the looks of a gay adult model. But don’t you think that’s how men just are? Don’t you think many men will objectify a cute or hot guy whether or not he appeared nude in a film or on a website?

Jesse Santana: I think that’s how simple-minded and unintelligent men are, yes. If a man is going to idolize a porn star then he should also respect them. And by respect I mean; yes, of course, think as many dirty and naughty things you want about a porn star, but unless you have a disease where your hand literally does not leave your dick, then surely there’s enough room in this world for a porn star to have a say in something and have feelings as well. Some people just need to get real and quit living in fantasy land 24/7.

Kyler Coy: You’ve told me a few days ago that some of the critics of your blog have called you a hypocrite. I’m not going to ask you who called you a hypocrite, but I do want to ask you to talk a little about it. You have told me before that you have, and I quote, “participated in just about every genre of the active front-line of the sex industry, including stripping, porn, and even escorting.” It seems a bit obvious that whoever called you a hypocrite might be a little short-sighted, right? It doesn’t seem at all unfair for one to participate in porn, escorting or both and still want those extremes to be seen separately.

Jesse Santana: Exactly, I know what both sides are like, and they are very different. Although, I wouldn’t really use the word ‘extremes,’ seeing that they are both part of the sex industry. But then you can also relate it to the medical industry…does a chiropractor know how to clear up your acne? And does a dermatologist know how to fix your spine problem? Not necessarily.

Kyler Coy: And you’ve said you’ve participated in escorting before. I was curious to find out what your definition of “escorting” is.

Jesse Santana: Escorting, in my opinion, is just what they say it is…someone’s time and company in exchange for money. But, like you said before, men are men, and many men are respectful, but most aren’t… they objectify cute or hot guys, and a very large percentage of escorts are hired with the assumption that there is going to be a ‘happy’ ending.

Kyler Coy: And you’ve been to Hustlaball Vegas sponsored by RentBoy.com, right? You are a supporter of Rent Boy and their events it seems.

Jesse Santana: I’m a big supporter of RentBoy.com. I love them and they know that! They’ve even already given their support for the article. They know escorting better than anyone, and they know that it’s a separate and very specialized job that requires skills that even many porn stars don’t have.

Kyler Coy: So, the impression I’m getting is that you support choice and you don’t judge people on those decisions. People generally have to choose their own path and one’s path may not be good for another. You really just don’t want the public to make that decision for anyone else but themselves. Is that why you wrote the blog?

Jesse Santana: Yeah, I mean, the blog was written from my opinion and my personal experiences.

Kyler Coy: Of course, not everyone in the industry is both an escort and a model. It seems you mainly want people to realize that making such assumptions is just fueling stereotypes which are not entirely true. That in itself is another form of discrimination as it affects the way people think about one extreme or the other, and ultimately both, and stereotypes are just used to unfairly judge a group of people unfairly. Is that a correct interpretation?

Jesse Santana: That’s very correct as far as I see it. Nobody likes to fit stereotypes. Watch the movie Crash. If you’re black, you don’t want people thinking you might break into their car. If you’re Mexican, you don’t want people thinking you can’t speak English. If you’re Asian, you don’t want people thinking you’re not well endowed. If you’re gay, you don’t want people thinking you have aids. And if you’re a porn star, you don’t want people thinking you’re an escort.

Kyler Coy: I understand you’re dating Guy Parker and that you’ve celebrated your one year anniversary with him on January 17th, just a few weeks back. Congratulations.

Jesse Santana: Thank you! I love him, and there’s no end in site. (Smiling like a madman)

Kyler Coy: How did you two meet?

Jesse Santana: We met through mutual friends. Although, for months it was limited to a crush, until he finally left his loser ex… heheh. At that point we knew there was no choice but to be together.

Kyler Coy: I was wondering how the blog has affected people’s view of your boyfriend, and whether or not it has affected your relationship with him.

Jesse Santana: So far there seems to be no impact on our relationship. And there better not be, or I’ll be knockin’ some heads… hehe. He’s a perfect angel. If anything, it would be a positive impact that it’s had, because he always supports me and that’s a good feeling. You may notice that I can’t help but smile a lot when I talk about Guy…

Kyler Coy: Besides being an adult film model, what do you do for a living or what would be your ideal choice for a career? At 21, are you still attending university, or do you plan to in the future?

Jesse Santana: I’m currently taking a course to be a certified personal trainer. It’s my dream one day to start up a new brand of fitness centers/gyms geared towards gay guys, with tanning beds, salons and all… hehe. I dropped out of college so that I could move to Dallas, but I plan on finishing my Exercise Science degree within the next 4 years.

Kyler Coy: What is Guy’s career outside of the Adult Entertainment Industry?

Jesse Santana: Guy is a photo stylist’s assistant, and he’s involved with dancing at Rhythm Nation Studios in Dallas.

Kyler Coy: Since we’re already on the topic of you and Guy, I really have to ask my random question for this interview right now. I saw you both present an award at the GayVNs 2008. Lex Sabre and I were wondering which one of you two mispronounced Lex’s name at the award show. So who was it that said, “Sa-ber-ay?”

Jesse Santana: Haha, it was actually Guy who said Lex’s name wrong. He said he was just really nervous.

Kyler Coy: And a few of us can’t stop teasing Lex about it, but we like Guy. He’s a sweet guy. Well, thank you for taking the time to participate in this interview with me.

Jesse Santana: Thank you so much Kyler! It’s a relief to get these issues off my chest, and it’s honestly been a pleasure chatting with you and having your attention.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Damn...

... I'm out of cigarettes. What the fuck!!!

I know I'm bugging the shit out of my brother's friend - who is staying at my house at the moment cause we let him - by walking by his door over and over again cause I'm acting all obsessive compulsive by cleaning every gawd damned thing in the house. Geez... I know I fucking rubbed a few out already, but he's French, his wife isn't here tonight (and she's Chinese, so I know he likes rice) and I really just wanna fuck him. Hehe... maybe I am a slut, but y'all should just pretend that I'm a lovable strumpet anyway.

Still awake...

As the title says, I'm still awake. I've suddenly been struck by a vicious case of restless insomnia (I know that was redundant, but I'm tired, I can't sleep and I don't care). I don't know if it's some spiritual boredom, or if Eric Rhodes' depression is spreading, but I'm just unhappy right now.

As you may know, I've been travelling constantly, and I was hoping it would get me out of my funk, but all that nasty crap has somehow caught up with me. So, after being kicked out of Germany (well, I was kindly asked to leave, but I'm just as bitter), I went to Amsterdam for an awesome party. I had fun, got fucked up, got fucked, and left for London. In one day, I saw the British Museum, Big Ben (seriously, I've seen bigger) and parliament, Westminster Abbey... blah blah blah. In New York, I went to my regular hangout, O.W. in Midtown East, and got fucked up almost everynight and shopped everyday and went to an orgy during the Saturday I was there where I fooled around and got fucked by 30-something hot guys (I only got fucked by four guys, I think, and while using condoms of course, but I gave a lot of head to everyone else). In L.A., I got fucked up at Here Lounge then got fucked somewhere else... and then I was told to go to San Francisco. By the way: I'm not a slut; I'm a lovable strumpet.

And now, in San Francisco, I'm sleeping in a giant custom made bed, watching TV, and being a bum in a three story townhouse near Coit Tower for free. Why the fuck am I sooo restless right now. I don't really know what to say. I've thought about everything I did today, which was pretty much nothing compared to a normal person's day, and it makes me feel even more fucke up. Judge for yourself if I should feel the way or not. Here was my day:

I ate three glazed Entenmann's donuts before I walked a couple of blocks and bought Blake Riley a congrats card for his big win - Blake, if you're reading this, sorry, but I fucked up this sweet gesture which was supposed to be a surprise by blogging about it - while talking to my friend Alex about his job, his clients (not escort clients, but actual clients related to his job), and how cute Matt Dallas is cause the new episode of Kyle XY (ABCfamily 8/7c with repeats at midnight) was on today. Then I spent $120 on a brick of six year old Chinese tea in Chinatown... cause I choose to ignore the fact that I'm broke from all the flights I've been on. Then I went back to the house and answered e-mails for a few hours while watching the tube with porn playing on my computer, all while waiting for Kyle XY to come on. I cooked and ate a NY Strip steak. After that, it got really, really boring... I jacked off three or four times to straight porn cause I couldn't think of anything better to do, acted obsessive compulsive and cleaned the house, drank eight pots of tea, ate a pint of green tea ice cream, flossed and brushed my teeth four times, flirted and turned down sex and escort clients on-line, and smoked half a pack of cigarettes... none of that in any specific or planned order, of course.


Yes, that was a little too detailed... but it's all on my mind for some stupid reason... especially the donuts, the steak, and the ice cream (so sue me... I had a fat day). Seriously... WTF. I think I'm fallen into this funk 'cause I just don't know what my future is going to be... and I'm afraid to move forward after failing to actually live in Germany like I originally planned. Now, I have no plan, not enough money, and no job. I'm a frightened fag with nothing to do.

Suggestions, anyone?

If I actually post this, I'm going to be surprised... oh fuck it. I don't care. I'm posting this blog even if it makes me sound like a whiny bitch. I admit it, I fucked up back in August by moving to Germany and relying on that plan to work without having an alternative plan. If saying that makes me a whiny bitch, then so be it, cause at least I have $120 worth of tea, vodka-redbulls, and cigarettes while I ponder shit over.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Pornstar/Escort: Where to Draw the Line

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Photos from the GayVNs Un-official After Party @ Powerhouse



Me and Eric Rhodes goofing off

Eric Rhodes and Chad Donovan

Me and Chi Chi LaRue lounging in the back of Powerhouse

Chi Chi and Chad Hunt

Chi Chi and her nephew who won a GayVN award for his score in Link: the Evolution.

Hall of Fame Inductee Rod Barry and Chi Chi

Chi Chi feeling up Eric Rhodes' exposed ass.

Doesn't Eric's ass look amazing?

Still can't get enough...


Now, some pictures of Wolf Hudson:






Some pictures of Chad Hunt:








Some Pictures of Antonio Madeira:









Monday, February 18, 2008

A Few GayVN Photos



Jeremy Hall and Christian Owen on the Red Carpet



Rod Barry, Jeremy Hall and Zach Rockwood on the Red Carpet



Derrick Hanson on the Red Carpet



Me and Fabrizio on the Red Carpet



Josh Vaughn, Me, and Blake Riley on the Red Carpet



Josh Vaughn and Jason Sechrest on the Red Carpet



Barett Long and Brent Corrigan



Damian Rios on the stairs



Damian Rios and Derrick Hanson with the girls



Chad Hunt and I



Blake Riley and Chad Hunt waiting for the bathroom